Now, Angel...You know I love you like my brother, but this Conspiracy Theory you have about some guy named Aaron Swartz being murdered by the government is just plain silly.
"Aaron Swartz knew too much about the NSA, Jim!"
Well, I did some research on him and Aaron Swartz commited suicide out-and-out. Look, he was depressed. His own father stated that. And coupled with the fact a depressed man was facing a 35 year prison sentence and a 13 felony charges and a $1 million dollar lawsuit, anybody would take their own life.
"He knew too much, I tell 'ya!
He knew about Operation FLAME...and and and...he about the government spying on us with our laptop video cameras and video game consoles."
Yeah, and he also knew about 9/11 and the Patriot Act and how none of that should be a secret to anybody with two brains to rub together. Are you ready to get out of here yet?
"Ok. But I want you to admit that Aaron Swartz wanted to change some things in America. Like INTERNET EQUALITY and DIGITAL FAIRNESS."
Fine. I'll admit to all of that if you admit that stealing documents from MIT's JShop was a crime and he should've been put in jail.
"Ok...so this was a Conspiracy Theory wasn't it?"
If by theory, you mean the crazy ramblings of a lonely old man on the internet...yes.
What is this Rockford Files sketch about? I don't get it.
Where's the jokes?
I've got a good mind to come out of retirement if these Conspiracy Theories don't get any better.
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