*Warning: PIRATE RADIO presentation*
Adult film star Nikki Delano has garnered over a dozen industry nominations since joining the industry in 2011, including a Best Supporting Actress nomination from the industry's largest awards show, the XBIZ Awards, in 2014. In 2012, she took home the trophy for Latina Performer of the Year from NightMoves, the third-oldest adult industry awards show in the U.S. But growing up, Nikki didn't aspire to be an adult film star. In fact, for years, she thought she wanted to work in law enforcement. Here, she tells Cosmopolitan.com about how she accidentally got into the industry, why she loves it, and how her family shaped who she is.
I'm the oldest of eight kids, born to a Puerto Rican father and a Colombian-Italian mom, though I was raised by my grandmother. She's extremely straight, and she really taught me discipline and morality. We're Catholic, and I think in Latino families, especially the older generation, they want you to grow up and have a better life than they could have had. She provided for me and pushed me to do my best. Two aunts, my uncle, and my cousin lived with us, and they, and my grandmother, really helped discipline me.
So I went to college and graduated with a degree in forensic psychology with double minors in criminology and addiction studies. I didn't know exactly what I wanted to do, but I was leaning toward working for the government or the NYPD. I know — kind of crazy, considering where I am now.
I know that a lot of people assume women get into porn because of their upbringing. People think that most girls come from single parents or that all their parents were addicted to something or that they just had a terrible life. I've even had fans ask me if girls do porn to pay for their drug addictions. But for the most part, I had a really good life: My grandmother gave that to me.
It's funny how I got started in the adult business. I had been doing some modeling and dating this guy for a while. I went to a modeling convention, and someone came up to me and asked me if I was interested in doing adult work. I said no; if my family had known, they would have disowned me! But for some reason, I took down his information anyway. Then I found out my boyfriend was cheating on me. So to get back at him — I don't know what I was thinking — I called the guy up and said I'd do it. I figured I'd do the first couple scenes and no one would find out about [it]. I thought, It's a new challenge; it's something different.
I was nervous for my first scene, but once I finished, I was hooked. I loved being able to express myself sexually on film — it was the deciding factor for me. And once I saw all the detail that goes into making the movie, I was really intrigued. In fact, I eventually want to open my own production company.
My family found out about a month later. We lived in a little town where everyone knows each other and somebody at the gym told my uncle, and he told my aunt and grandmother. My grandmother was really disappointed in me. It hurt me so much because I always want to please her and make her proud of me, and I didn't choose the path that she wanted me to take. We grow thinking we should be police officers or doctors. We're told go to school, finish college, and get a career. But I don't think I should be attacked for my choice to work as an adult film star. It's still a job.
Now, my career is always the elephant in the room with my family. But they see how successful I have become and they know that I'm not a drug addict and that I'm doing well for myself, and I think that's helping them to accept me.
Juliland/Richard Avery
On the other hand, my godfather and my high school best friend wouldn't invite me to their weddings. They both said, "I don't want you here. People know what you do." That was such a shock, and it really hurt me. But I told them, and I tell everyone, that being in the adult film industry doesn't change who I am. "Nikki Delano" is a persona, but I'm still Nicole. I'm still the same person I've always been growing up.
I don't regret what I do, and I'm proud no matter what, even though people have a misconception that porn is dirty or disgusting. I work for major companies, and everybody's professional. It's very nine-to-five: We have our scripts, we show up prepared, we have a professional crew on set, we do our job, and we go home. It's very much like a regular movie, but there's also sex. And everyone is tested for STDs every seven to 14 days.
I keep my real life pretty private. "Nikki Delano" is a single sex goddess. Every guy wants to be with her, so on camera, I play up her sexuality as much as I want. It's really hard to date in this industry. I've been in relationships where guys have used the fact that I'm in porn as ammunition and have said things like, "Well, I'm going to go have sex with this girl. Why should you care because you're going to have sex with someone today at work?" I need to have someone who is open and can really communicate. He has to understand that when I'm on set, I'm doing my thing, yes, but that it's just a role.
I try to stay grounded and humble, and I always try to remember that the people you see on your way up in the industry are the same people you're going to see on your way down, but the biggest lesson I've learned so far is that as long as you're true to yourself, it doesn't matter where you've been. "Nikki Delano" is my alter ego, but Nicole is my true self. And I'm not going to change who I really am.