Hello! I am Frank Finkle 3000 and this is my Conspiracy Theory.
Is there a WAR ON JOURNALISM?
My guest today is-
"Let me stop you there, Finkle. Journalism must go in-and-out of trends to keep the attention of it's viewers and readers. Journalism is still a respected applied science. But don't take my word for it. Why don't you listen to our media personality, Susan."
"Susan, we're ready for you to in 3...2...1..."
"Olso will experience a cold front coming from the west and possibly an earthquake."
"The earthquake will be streaming on Facebook and Twitter if you follow our station's website."
Wait a minute, this isn't journalism. This is a naked girl promoting a website by vaguely giving us the weather.
"Finkle, you don't understand the modern audience for television news and how we generate income. You see, journalism is only as good as the audience. It's not 1946 anymore."
Does the weather girl have to be naked?
"No, she doesn't. But it gets the viewers. And our website gets the clicks for the advertising dollars we charge."
Then how do you give the accurate news?
"Oh, we have Janice for that."
"The president of America wants to grab a woman by the pussy, and we will broadcast it live on our podcast. Like us on Twitter."
Wait, you can't do the news like that.
"We can't?"
No, not without mentioning Maury's House Of Bagels. When you think bagels, think Maury's bagels.
No comments:
Post a Comment