My name is Sebastian, and I am a film critic. If you don't like spoilers ruining the film for you...go piss off. I only do spoilers, peasants!
Hi, I'm Trudy. I'm here to explain to you that Sebastian isn't as bad as he seems. He really likes doing reviews. He just has a problem talking to other people on blogs.
I was told you were serving a Denzel Washington movie. The only reason I came to this filthy theater was for Denzel Washington, you people.
But, we gave him what we had and he understood immediately how good it was.
Oh my God! I know what movie this is now. This is BATMAN! You gave me a Batman movie.
He befriends a young ward...that was Robin!
He fights henchmen in a car...that was the Bat-mobile!
He enters a room of total strangers and starts fights...that's straight out the comic books!
He even wore a disguise to fight crime on a train going to a foreign country. That means he's rich...like Batman!
This was the most delicious movie I didn't order....Bravo, you pathetic mongrels. I enjoyed it very much.
Mr Sebastian was so happy, he ate the whole thing and gave me a handsome tip. So see, he's not as bad as he seems. Unless, it's Mel Gibson. You don't wanna know what he thinks about Australians.
Anyways, thanks for reading Sebastian's blog.
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