Hello! I'm Frank Finkle 3000 and this is my Conspiracy Theory.
Who is responsible for the SARIN GAS attack in Syria.
For answers, let's watch a clip from the movie Godzilla starring a bunch of hack actors.
"Prepare to release the Sarin Gas!...but just the one that the White Helmets gave us."
"Oh my God, how could anybody destroy so much for no reason!"
THE BABIES!
"Sargent? Do I have permission to release the Sarin Gas that Assad gave us?"
"I told you already. The White Helmets gave us the gas. Syria had it's production stopped years ago and rendered useless."
"But sir, the White Helmets are working for Al Qaeda."
THE BABIES!!
"Men, whatever you do, don't let anything happen to the pipeline Saudi Arabia wants to build that's going through this country. This is all about protecting that pipeline!"
"Yes sir. I'll protect that pipeline...or my name isn't Expendable Asset Jones."
THE BABIES!!
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! RUSSIA DOES NOT CONTROL ME!
SOMEBODY GET THE APPROVAL RATINGS AND BRING THEM TO MY GOLF COURSE!
MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!...BELIEVE ME!...TRUST ME!
Be sure to buy Maury's Bagels. When you think bagels, think Maury.
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