Gather 'round chil'ren. While I tell you a Conspiracy Theory.
Everybody comfortable? Good.
A long time ago, there was a man called Indiana Republican who made up a WHOLE bunch of lies so she could get a job with the government.
And it all started with a woman called Pearl Harbor.
Indiana Republican hated her so much, she got on the radio and said:
"Hey, the president was given a Bomb Plot Message!"
Wow, what's that?
"Japan was asking about our ships and where they are."
Wow!
Now, Indiana didn't tell the people the Bomb Plot Message never said Japan will attack Pearl Harbor on December 7, 1941.
"Hey, we should have 10 investigations and 25,000 pages on tax payers money to prove my story"
Yay!
And that was to take your mind off the Great Depression that she didn't want to do anything about it. She was EVIL woman.
"The Trip Tide Pact gave Japan the right to attack Pearl Harbor"
We didn't know that!
America didn't know a lot. Like the Trip Tide Pact says if Japan was attacked, Germany could come to their help. But, Japan attacked Pearl Harbor, so it didn't count.
Uncle Remus, who was Pearl Harbor?
She lived in a lovely place called Hawaii.
Is she ok now, Uncle Remus?
Yes she is. But, a few years ago, a new evil villain called Richard Hill wrote a book and wanted to start the lies all over again.
Was he like Indiana Republican?
Oh, he was worse. He was a History Republican. But that's a story for another day, chil'ren.
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