"Conspiracy Theory" with Mary Poppins (The Noble Experiment)

*Warning: PIRATE RADIO is on the air*

Come children as I tell you a Conspiracy Theory about how America went to war with everything German in 1920.
Pabst, Schlitz, Blatz, and Miller were forced out of business because the 18th Amendment and a Alabama Republican got together with the WCTU and the Ku Klux Klan to make life better for us all.


But it didn't did it, Miss Poppins?


Oh no, it didn't.
In fact, it was the very opposite happened.
Some Americans hated so many people, they wanted to punish immigrants, punish Blacks, and since every state in the Confederacy was for it, it was designed to punish the northern states for the Civil War that they lost 50 years earlier.


Did they drink any less?


Heaven's no!
They drank more and more, because it wasn't illegal to drink alcoholic drink. It was illegal to sell, produce, and distribute alcoholic drink.

Eww...Did we save any lives at least?


Oh my no!
You see, the government forced many non German distillers to add toxic and even deadly additives to their products in order to scare away the young from drinking alcohol. 12,000 Americans died in all of Prohibition.


Wait...are we talking about Prohibition, Miss Poppins?


Yes, between 1920 and 1929, right before the Great Depression.
I guess you could say, that one Alabama Republican and the KKK both conspired to destroy the American government....hmmm.

That's crazy, Miss Poppins. People love the state of Alabama.

Silly boy. Quick, let's have a beer and forget history ever happened in America. We're number one! We're number one!