Friday, March 17, 2017

"Conspiracy Theory" with Frank Finkle (TRUMP'S BUDGET PLAN)

*Warning: PIRATE RADIO is on the air*
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"It is I, New Newsman with the news. Today we talk about the TRUMP BUDGET PLAN and ask ourselves 'What would America be like if Jeb Bush was president?"

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"We go to our reporter in EARTH BETA for an interview of the typical American...Kevin?"

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Hi-ho! This is Kevin D. Frog here, and I'm going to talk with a typical American after they just heard about the Bush Budget Pan on EARTH BETA.

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"Well, we don't need Meals-On-Wheels if we replace all the humans with robots. Why, I have one right here to replace me after the zombie apoc...opps...I said too much already."

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"I have a million egglets and I don't have to pay any egg taxes, thanks to complicated and favorable egg tax laws. You eggers do whatever you egging want. The Eggs will always outlast."

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"I voted for Bernie Sanders, so all you idiots can suck it!"

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"I know I'm a clock and all, but I think everything around here is going backwards somehow."

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As you can see, the people here are very complacent about how they live. Their mail still comes on time and the people that will suffer aren't in their face.

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"Fascinating report. EARTH BETA is practically the same Earth, but with a different president?"

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Oh no, Jeb Bush isn't on Twitter talking about conspiracy theories or television ratings or building a Mexican wall or saying the Russians are friendly or making a fool of himself on the international stage.

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"So, EARTH BETA is a better place then?"

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Oh God, yes! You should come over. There's a sale on bagels at Maury's House of Bagels and everything.


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First it was Bugs Bunny, now it's The Muppets? And what's this Earth Beta nonsense? This is garbage, Gladys.
Delete the whole thing and start over...

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