Hello! I am Frank Finkle and this is my Conspiracy Theory.
Does Al Qaeda exist?
My guest today is former leader of Afghanistan, Hamid Karzai.
"Are you a robot? Why am I being interviewed by a robot?"
Our show is called Conspiracy Theory and we understand you have a theory that Al Qaeda does not exist.
"Yes, my intelligence office can not prove to me they exist. Here in Afghanistan we have the Taliban, but they are being funded by outside forces. America and the west tells me we have Daesh, but when we arrest the attackers, they are Pakistani militias."
Does the west call Pakistanis, Daesh?
"I don't know. Maybe, if they called them Cherry Coke people would get suspicious."
But, if Al Qaeda does not exist, who has America been fighting?
"Hey, you got any Cherry Coke around here?"
No...but we do have bagels. Maury's bagels! Would you like a bagel?
"Bagel? You're offering an Afghanistan a bagel?"
Don't worry, I'll give you a knife...or a sword...what is it you people eat with anyway?
"Never mind. This show is silly."
Seriously, I don't know how you people eat? With your feet? Broomsticks?...
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