I am Frank Finkle 3000, and this is my Conspiracy Theory.
Was the year 2016 cursed by supernatural forces outside of our understanding?
My guest to answer that question is Homer Simpson as The Grim Reaper.
"Go ahead and ask me anything...but not about who let the dogs out...or what's in those 11 herbs and spices."
Understood. Mr Reaper, was the year 2016 complete?
"Yes, I'll say it was. I was real busy with celebrities and world leaders."
That is what this year will be remembered for?
"Yep, and I also killed hopes and dreams and little bit of Democracy."
Hopes and dreams? You can not kill hopes and dreams.
"Hehe...sure you can. I killed the United Kingdom with Brexist. I killed America with Trump. I killed Brazil with bad public relations and the Zika Virus.
Face it, this year was ALL ABOUT ME."
Was there anyone you didn't want to kill this year?
"Yes...Keith Richards. Every year I put him down, but then I listen to a Rolling Stones album and I give him one more chance."
Do you have any predictions for 2017, Mr Reaper?
"Yes....buy Maury's bagels. When you think of bagels, think Maury's bagels."
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